One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally he decided the animal was old and the well needed to be covered up anyway, so it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey. He invited all his neighbo

THE KIDDIE PICK... When you're by yourself and you uninhibitedly twist your forefinger into your nostril with childlike joy and freedom. And the best part is, there's no time limit! CAMOUFLAGED KIDDIE PICK... When, in the presence of other people, you wrap your forefin

It's finally here And you gotta stay put 'Cause the new fallen snow Has closed off your route. But, hey, that's not so bad! View it like this: It's your long-longed-for chance To have amorous bliss. It's a real dream come true For you and your love; A blessi

How are women and tornadoes alike? They both moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they leave.

Twas the night before Friday and all through the town, no cops were cruising, no narks were around. As we all rolled our joints to be put in our sacks, we knew that soon we'd be stoned to the max. We drank Jack Daniel's And smoked Panama Red, a hit of tea

Married life is full of excitement and frustration: * In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. * In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. * In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen. It is true that love is blind but marriage is de

A little kid asks his father, “Daddy, is God a man or a woman?” “Both son. God is both.” After awhile the kid comes again and asks, “Daddy, is God black or white?” “Both son, both.” “Daddy, does God love children?” “Yes

You touch my hand and look at me. There is a message in your eyes Which makes me fidget nervously Although it does not much surprise. If I had any sense I'd flee, Make some excuses, tell you lies, Suggest that I could never be Party to such an enterprise, Say that I

Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador". Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks. When Christmas carolling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained. Wear a cape that

If I get scared,wld u hold me tight?If I make a mistake,wld u make it rite?If I build a fire,wld u watch over e flame?If I say i miss u,wld u feel e same? My eyes R hurting coz I can't C U, My arms R empty coz I can't hold U, M