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First Job First Job

"A young family moved into a house, next to a vacant lot. One day, a construction crew turned up to start building a house on the empty lot. The young family's 5-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity going on next door and spent much of each day observing the worke

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The Smart Blonde The Smart Blonde

A blonde woman boards an airplane. She is extremely exhausted and just wants to take a nap. She finally finds her seat and sits down next to a very curious young man. He wants to test the whole dub blonde thing and possibly make some money out of it. "Hey, wanna play a game?" he asks her.

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Funny George Burns Quotes Funny George Burns Quotes

FUNNY QUOTES BY GEORGE BURNS "When I was young I was called a rugged individualist. When I was in my fifties I was considered eccentric. Here I am doing and saying the same things I did then and

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Unlucky Young Man Unlucky Young Man

A young man goes into a drug store to buy condoms. The pharmacist says the condoms come in packs of 3, 9 or 12 and asks which the young man wants. "Well," he said, "I've been seeing this girl for a while and she's really hot. I want the condoms because I think tonight's &qu

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Funny Salvador Dali Quotes Funny Salvador Dali Quotes

FUNNY QUOTES "The first man to compare the cheeks of a young woman to a rose was obviously a poet; the first to repeat it was possibly an idiot." "What is an elegant woman? An elegant woman is a woman who d

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Birds and kids Birds and kids

Birds and kids Pictures - Funny picture

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Don't hit kids avatar Don't hit kids avatar

Don't hit kids avatar Avatars

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Sms Jokes Sms Jokes

Be friendly with your kids, they choose your home when you are old!

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Funny Old Age Quotes Funny Old Age Quotes

FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT OLD AGE & DEATH "At my age I do what Mark Twain did. I get my daily paper, look at the obituaries page and if I'm not there I carry on as usual." Patrick Moore. "First you forget names, then

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The Service The Service

One Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Alex was staring up at the large plaque that hung in the foyer of the church. It was covered with names, and small American flags were mounted on either side of it. The seven-year-old had been staring at th e plaque for some time, so the pastor walked

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 What a Woman Wants in a Man  At various ages What a Woman Wants in a Man At various ages

What women want in a man at age 25: 1. Handsome 2. Charming 3. Financially successful 4. A caring listener 5. Witty 6. In good shape 7. Dresses with style 8. Appreciates finer things 9. Full of thoughtful surprises 10. An imaginative, romantic lover Wh

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Girl and mother Girl and mother

A: Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a girl? B: It's a girl. She's my daughter. A: Oh, I'm sorry, sir. I didn't know that you were her father. B: I'm not. I'm her mother.

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Alligator Shoes Alligator Shoes

A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers,

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At Christmas Time At Christmas Time

At Xmas time when we were kids, we were bloody poor, and Santa weren't too generous when he knocked upon our door But we made do by saving up, yes every little bit "We may be poor" said dear old Dad, "but I dont give a shit!" Our Xmas tree

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Yo Mama's So Fat Jokes 8 Yo Mama's So Fat Jokes 8

Yo Mama's so fat if I put a firecracker up her ass, and it exploded she would be feeding kids in India for years Your momma is so fat she changed the phrase "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"! Yo momma so fat that when I ran around her I got lost! Yo momma s

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Top ten cute love quotes Top ten cute love quotes

Favorite Cute Love Quotes #1     LOVE: The irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.     Mark Twain Favorite Cute Love Quotes #2     I'm not rushing into being in love. I'm finding fourth grade hard enough.     Regina 'Age 1

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FIFTY SOMETHING Copyright; Shirley Friend From her book 'Another Dose From Floozie' “Do you know...what day it is?” “Nope”...said my beau. “What's today?” “Well! If you can't remember”, I cried “I'm

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Funny Quotes About Children Funny Quotes About Children

FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT CHILDREN "Insanity is hereditary: You can get it from your children." Sam Levinson. "Children really brighten up a household. They never turn the lights off." Ralph Bus. "There are

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If Jesus Could See Me Now If Jesus Could See Me Now

Sunday morning, washed and brushed; suit on, all neatly pressed, I make my way to worship; I hope you are impressed! I've got my Sunday Bible; I like the old "AV", If it was good enough for Paul, it's good enough for me! My neighbours see me leaving, for I make sure

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Blondes Pain Blondes Pain

A young woman said to her doctor, "You have to help me, I hurt all over." "What do you mean?" said the doctor. The woman touched her right knee with her index finger and yelled, "Ow, that hurts." Then she touched her left cheek and again yelled, "Ouch! That hurts, too." Then she touched he

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Why should you check your children\'s homework Why parents should always check their children's homework before they hand it in: See the picture attached. :-)) A first grade girl handed in the drawing, enclosed here, for a homework assignment. After it was graded and the child brought it home, she returned to school the next day with the following note: Dear Ms. Davis, I want to be very clear on my child's illustration. It is NOT of me on a dance pole on a stage in a strip joint. I work at Home Depot and had commented to my daughter how much money we made in the recent snowstorm. This photo is of me selling a shove
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