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Funny text quotes about mean spirited people

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Funny John Cleese Quotes Funny John Cleese Quotes

FUNNY QUOTES BY JOHN CLEESE "Comedy always works best when it is mean-spirited." "I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel, and incompetent comes naturally to me." &q

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Top ten funny love quotes Top ten funny love quotes

Favorite Funny Love Quotes #1     I know that somewhere in the Universe exists my perfect soulmate -- but looking for her is much more difficult than just staying at home and ordering another pizza.     Alf Whit Favorite Funny Love Quotes #2     I w

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Top ten love quotes Top ten love quotes

Favorite Love Quotes #1     Love doesn't make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.     Franklin P. Jones Favorite Love Quotes #2     At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet.     Plato Favorite Love Quote

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Top ten romantic quotes Top ten romantic quotes

Favorite Romantic Quotes #1     Real love stories never have endings.     Richard Bach Favorite Romantic Quotes #2     Two souls and one thought, two hearts and one pulse.     Halen Favorite Romantic Quotes #3    

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Top ten cute love quotes Top ten cute love quotes

Favorite Cute Love Quotes #1     LOVE: The irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.     Mark Twain Favorite Cute Love Quotes #2     I'm not rushing into being in love. I'm finding fourth grade hard enough.     Regina 'Age 1

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Funny Ambrose Bierce Quotes Funny Ambrose Bierce Quotes

FUNNY QUOTES BY AMBROSE BIERCE "An acquaintance is someone we know well enough to borrow from but not enough to lend to." "An ambassador is a person who, having failed to secure an office from the people, is given one

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Top ten sad love quotes Top ten sad love quotes

Favorite Sad Love Quotes #1     Love can sometimes be magic. But magic can sometimes... just be an illusion.     Javan Favorite Sad Love Quotes #2     It is better to have loved and lost than never to have lost at all.     Samuel But

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Funny George W Bush Quotes Funny George W Bush Quotes

FUNNY QUOTES FROM GEORGE W BUSH "A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls." "I was raised in the West. The west of Texas. It's pretty close to California. In more ways than Washington,

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Funny Dan Quayle Quotes Funny Dan Quayle Quotes

FUNNY QUOTES FROM DAN QUAYLE "Welcome to President Bush, Mrs. Bush, and my fellow astronauts." "We're going to have the best-educated American people in the world." 9/21/88 "We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a 'part'

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Funny International Political Quotes Funny International Political Quotes

FUNNY QUOTES FROM INTERNATIONAL POLITICS "China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese." Former French President Charles de Gaulle. "Traditionally most of Australia's imports come from overseas." Former Australian cabinet mi

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Funny Oscar Wilde Quotes Funny Oscar Wilde Quotes

FUNNY QUOTES BY OSCAR WILDE "In married life three is company and two none." From 'The Importance of Being Earnest' 1895. "To lose one parent may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness." From 'T

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Funny Denis Leary Quotes Funny Denis Leary Quotes

FUNNY QUOTES BY DENIS LEARY "I would never do crack... I would never do a drug named after a part of my own ass, okay?" "We live in a country where John Lennon takes six bullets in the chest. Yoko Ono is sta

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Funny Salvador Dali Quotes Funny Salvador Dali Quotes

FUNNY QUOTES "The first man to compare the cheeks of a young woman to a rose was obviously a poet; the first to repeat it was possibly an idiot." "What is an elegant woman? An elegant woman is a woman who d

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Funny Music Quotes Funny Music Quotes

Funny Music Quotes "The Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scotts as a joke, but the Scotts haven't seen the joke yet." Oliver Herford. "Most rock journalism is people who can't write interviewin

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Funny Democracy & Government Quotes Funny Democracy & Government Quotes

FUNNY QUOTES ON DEMOCRACY AND GOVERNMENT "Democracy is being allowed to vote for the candidate you dislike least." Robert Byrne. "Democracy is too good to share with just anybody." Nigel Rees. "A government that robs Pete

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Funny Larry Flynt Quotes Funny Larry Flynt Quotes

FUNNY QUOTES BY LARRY FLYNT "There's nothing that will change someone's moral outlook quicker than cash in large sums." "If the human body's obscene, complain to the manufacturer, not to me." "The major

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Funny Programmer Quotes Funny Programmer Quotes

FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT THE PROGRAMMERS AND PROGRAMMING "I invented it, Bill made it famous." David Bradley (wrote the code for Ctrl-Alt-Delete on the IBM PC) "As soon as we started programming, we found to our surprise

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Funny Science Quotes Funny Science Quotes

FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT SCIENCE "Louis Pasteur's theory of germs is ridiculous fiction." Pierre Pachet, Professor of Physiology at Toulouse, 1872 . "The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would

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Funny Eddie Izzard Quotes Funny Eddie Izzard Quotes

FUNNY QUOTES BY EDDIE IZZARD "I like my coffee like I like my women. In a plastic cup." "I wanna live 'til I die, no more, no less." "Excuse me, do you have a pencil?" "Never put a sock in a toaster." &

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Funny Quotes on Death Funny Quotes on Death

FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT DEATH "Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours." Yogi Berra. "Death is a low chemical trick played on everybody except sequoia trees." JJ Furnas. &quo

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25 Signs You’re Drinking Too Much Coffee I love coffee, maybe too much. Cups of coffee, coffee smoothies, iced coffee from McDonald’s - you name it I’ll drink it (and alot of it). I can’t drink just one cup either, I can drink it all day. Anyone else have this problem? Not sure? Well, if at least 10 of these 25 signs you’re drinking too much coffee applies to you… you might be addicted.    1. Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.    2. You name your cats “Cream” and “Sugar.”    3. You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it&r
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