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When God gave you to me, he planted the image of you deep in my heart

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Funny Comedian Ravings Funny Comedian Ravings

FUNNY QUOTES: GENERAL COMEDIAN RAVINGS "I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet." Rodney Dangerfield. "You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she

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God and Adam God and Adam

God yawned a great yawn. He was awesomely bored After pottering around in His shed. He considered the chaos that swirled all around And thought: "It's time that summat got med!" So he shouted: "Be still!" and the howling let up As the winds and the tempest

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Funny Celebrity Quotes Funny Celebrity Quotes

FUNNY QUOTES BY FAMOUS CELEBRITIES "Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps." Emo Philips . "Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of

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Funny insurance claims Funny insurance claims

The statements below are taken from actual insurance accident claims forms. They are real, true (you can't make up this kind of stuff). Read 'em and laugh and be glad it wasn't you. Each image in the left column is a small part of an act

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Love SMS Messages Love SMS Messages

☻Of all the friends I've ever met. Your the one I won't forget. And if I die before you

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True Computer Illiteracy Stories. True Computer Illiteracy Stories.

A guy called and said, "My computer blew up!" But, really, he had only experienced the 'starfield' screensaver. When one person wanted to use with the mouse, they picked it up, pointed it at the screen and clicked it like a remote control. I was in the Univ. of Crete

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Are These True Facts? Are These True Facts?

After extensive study of the Shroud of Turin, it has now been theorized that Jesus had muttonchops. Citizens in Ohio unsuccessfully tried to start a charitable organization called "The Salvation Coast Guard". (thanks to Eric Snyder) After he was President, Harry S. Truman b

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How To Wash Your Clothes I can admit it, I’m a bit of a goof when it comes to doing household stuff. I’ve washed clothes maybe 10 times ever, usually things go ok but sometimes I put in a big white shirt and, for some reason, get back a little pink one. Can’t explain it really, and it appears I’m not the only one. I was going through my clothes, thinking about doing laundry for the 11th time, and was trying to figure out how I needed to was my nice new polo shirt. Reading the tag for inspiration, I now know exactly how to wash clothes…
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