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funny sms-miscellaneous funny sms-miscellaneous

If a big fat man creeps into your bedroom one night and stuffs you into a bag, Then do not worry 'cause I told Santa I wanted you for christmas! Smilin is infexous u catch it lik d flu.wen sum1 smild at me 2day i startd smilin 2.now im infectd iv sent it thru

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5 stages of drunkeness 5 stages of drunkeness

Stage 1 - SMART This is when you suddenly become an expert on every subject in the known Universe. You know everything and want to pass on your knowledge to anyone who will listen. At this stage you are always RIGHT. And of course the person you are talking to is very WRONG. This makes for an inte

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Persons an languages Persons an languages

A person who speaks two languages is bilingual...A person who speaks three languages is trilingual...A person who speaks four or more languages is multilingual. What is a person who speaks one language?

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Bad Book Bad Book

A blonde stormed up to the front desk of the library and said, "I have a complaint!" "Yes, Ma'am?" said the librarian looking up at her. "I borrowed a book last week and it was horrible!" Puzzled by her complain the librarian asked "What was wrong with it?" "It had way too many

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funny sms-wrong person funny sms-wrong person

wanted to send u something nice that would make u smile but the postman told me to get out of the mailbox! This message was sent exclusively for the handsome and the beautiful. We have obviously sent it to the wrong number.We are truly sorry for

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Guide for all women Guide for all women

A WOMAN'S GUIDE TO WHAT A MAN IS REALLY SAYING: I'M HUNGRY. I'm hungry. I'M SLEEPY. I'm sleepy. I'M TIRED. I'm tired. I'VE GOTTA GO. Get out of the way and stay away until it clears. WHAT'S WRONG? I don't see why you're making such a big deal out of this. WHAT

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What Is Technical Harassment. What Is Technical Harassment.

In our complex technical environment there are many opportunities for a competent technical individual to be the subject of technical harassment. Sometimes it can be so subtle that you may not even be aware you are being harassed. Worse yet, you may inadvertently

Funny stuff - Computers Funny text > Top

Funny Authors Quotes Funny Authors Quotes

FUNNY AUTHORS QUOTES I love being a writer. What I can't stand is the paperwork." Peter De Vries "About the most originality that any writer can hope to achieve honestly is to steal with good judgment." Josh Bi

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Son and dad Son and dad

Son: Dad, what is an idiot? Dad: An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange and long way that another person who is listening to him can't understand him. Do you understand me? Son: No.

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Top Ten Things You'll Never Hear Your Dad Say. Top Ten Things You'll Never Hear Your Dad Say.

10.  Well how 'bout that?...  I'm lost!  Looks like we'll have to stop and ask for directions. 9.  You know Pumpkin, now that you're thirteen, you'll be ready for non-chaperoned car dates.  Won't that be fun? 8.  I noticed that all your friends have a cert

Jokes - Other stuff Funny text > Top

Men's Rules Men's Rules

Women should learn these! Women, learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not considered by us to be opport

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Windows Error Messages. Windows Error Messages.

Winerr 001 : Windows loaded - System in danger Winerr 002 : No error - yet Winerr 003 : Dynaimc Linking Error - Your mistake is now in every file Winerr 004 : Erroneous Error - Nothing is wrong Winerr 005 : Multitasking Attempted - System confused Winerr 006 : Malicious Error - Desq

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25 Ways To Cope With Stress. 25 Ways To Cope With Stress.

1. Jam miniature marshmallows up your nose and sneeze them out. See how many you can do at a time. 2. Use your Mastercard to pay your Visa and vice-versa. 3. Pop some popcorn without putting the lid on. 4. When someone says "have a nice day", tell them you have

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funny sms-humor funny sms-humor

It's important to find a man who has money, a man who adores you,a man who is great in the sack. It's also imprtant that these 3 men should never meet! I've been arrested for bein the ugliest person in Britain, can u cum down the police station

SMS Messages Funny text > Top

Run Run

I was teaching a very basic class in BASIC programming to a group of adults. Adults who have never been around computers before are very nervous and much harder to teach than children, however I am a patient person so I enjoy their successes. However, I must share the following: After putting a sh

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Andy Rooney Thoughts Andy Rooney Thoughts

I've learned... That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person. That when you're in love, it shows. That just one person saying to me, "You've made my day!" makes my day. That having a child fall asleep in your arms

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dreams dreams

Ur only mine wen i dream.wen i wake i wanna scream.ur not mine im all alone.i can only text u on my fone.do dreams lie or r dey true-i hope so cos babes i want u! If dreams werent dreams & dreams came true i woodnt b here id b wiv u.Distance is

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Miscellaneous sms Messages Miscellaneous sms Messages

☻Stress is when you wake up and realises that you haven't slept yet.   ☻Reality is an illusion that

SMS Messages Funny text > Top

family fortunes answers family fortunes answers

real wrong and funny family fortunes answers The funniest and best list of Family Fortunes answers. Contestants from the ITV (UK) Family Fortunes game-show are asked to guess the most popular answers to questions posed in a survey. Some of these 'Family Misfortunes' answers are actually

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Girl and mother Girl and mother

A: Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a girl? B: It's a girl. She's my daughter. A: Oh, I'm sorry, sir. I didn't know that you were her father. B: I'm not. I'm her mother.

Jokes - Short jokes Funny text > Top
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25 Signs You’re Drinking Too Much Coffee I love coffee, maybe too much. Cups of coffee, coffee smoothies, iced coffee from McDonald’s - you name it I’ll drink it (and alot of it). I can’t drink just one cup either, I can drink it all day. Anyone else have this problem? Not sure? Well, if at least 10 of these 25 signs you’re drinking too much coffee applies to you… you might be addicted.    1. Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.    2. You name your cats “Cream” and “Sugar.”    3. You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it&r
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