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Speeding-Touching Love Story Speeding-Touching Love Story

(A girl and guy were speeding over 100 mph on a motorcycle) Girl: Slow down. Im scared. Guy: No this is fun. Girl: No its not. Please, its to scary! Guy: Then tell me you love me. Girl: Fine, I love you. Slow down! Guy: Now give me a BIG hug. (Girl hugs him) G

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From Bad To Worse. From Bad To Worse.

Bad: You find a porn movie in your son's room. Worse: You're in it. Bad: Your children are sexually active. Worse: With each other. Bad: Your husband's a crossdresser. Worse: He looks better than you. Bad: Your wife wants a divorce. Worse: She's a lawyer. Bad: Your wife's leavin

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10 Rules For Dating My Daughter. 10 Rules For Dating My Daughter.

Rule One: If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up. Rule Two: You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you

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From Bad To Worse 2. From Bad To Worse 2.

Good: Your hubby and you agree, no more kids Bad: You can't find your birth control pills Worse: Your daughter borrowed them Good: Your son studies a lot in his room Bad: You find several porn movies hidden there Worse: You're in them Good: Your husband understands fashion Bad: He's a cros

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First Job First Job

"A young family moved into a house, next to a vacant lot. One day, a construction crew turned up to start building a house on the empty lot. The young family's 5-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity going on next door and spent much of each day observing the worke

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I Am My Own Grandpa I Am My Own Grandpa

Many, many years ago When I was twenty-three I got married to a widow Pretty as could be. This widow had a grow-up daughter With flowing hair of red. My father fell in love with her, And soon the two were wed. This made my dad my son-in-law And changed my

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Father and son Father and son

Father: What did you do today to help your mother? Son: I dried the dishes Daughter: And I helped pick up the pieces.

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Girl and mother Girl and mother

A: Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a girl? B: It's a girl. She's my daughter. A: Oh, I'm sorry, sir. I didn't know that you were her father. B: I'm not. I'm her mother.

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Absurd sms Messages Absurd sms Messages

☻Linux is like a wigwam, no windows, no gates and an apache inside …

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A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, "When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?" The husband replied, "All I wanted to do was to

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The Bar Story The Bar Story

This guy goes to a bar that's on the tenth floor of a hotel. He sits down and has a couple of drinks, then stands up, announces loudly that he has had enough, and goes over and jumps out the window. Now, there are two men who are sitting a

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The Bar Story The Bar Story

This guy goes to a bar that's on the tenth floor of a hotel. He sits down and has a couple of drinks, then stands up, announces loudly that he has had enough, and goes over and jumps out the window. Now, there are two men who are sitting at a window table, and having that natural human curiosity ab

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The Top 17 Reasons Why Your Family Is Dysfunctional. The Top 17 Reasons Why Your Family Is Dysfunctional.

17. New bill to ban assault weapons specifically mentions your family. 16. Your vacations are planned through AA instead of AAA. 15. Your mother and your pre-teen sister always fighting over the last beer. 14. In the middle of family reunion, FBI cuts power to ranch. 13.

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Alabama Mom To Alabama Son. Alabama Mom To Alabama Son.

Dear Son, I'm writing this slow 'cause I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you left. Your dad read in the paper where most accidents happened within twenty miles of home, so we moved. I won't be able to send you the address as the las

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Let me Love You-Tragic Love Story Let me Love You-Tragic Love Story

Once upon a time, there was once a guy who was very much in love with this girl. This romantic guy folded 1,000 pieces of papercranes as a gift to his girl. Although, at that time he was just a small executive in his company, his f

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Jokes sms messages Jokes sms messages

☻When the apple is green and ready to pluck. When a girl is sixteen she's ready to fuck!

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Why should you check your children's homework Why should you check your children's homework

Why should you check your children's homework  Jokes - Funny Jokes

Why parents should always check their children's homework before they hand it in: See the picture attached. :-)) A first grade girl handed in the drawing, enclosed here, for a homework assignment. After it was graded and the child brought it home, she returned to school the next day wit

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Funny Quotes About Children Funny Quotes About Children

FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT CHILDREN "Insanity is hereditary: You can get it from your children." Sam Levinson. "Children really brighten up a household. They never turn the lights off." Ralph Bus. "There are

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Just follow the Tracks Just follow the Tracks

3 men are stranded in the middle of the Canadian Forest and they don't know where they are at. They decide that they have to find some food. So the first man leaves and tells the other 2 that he is going to get some food. Several Hours later, he comes back with a deer over his shoulder. The other

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Sex Messages Sex Messages

☻Sex is a sensation. It's about a man's temptation, putting his location in a woman's destination. Do y

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